Posted on 13 June 2010.
So today is the 24th of May. Somewhere, on the other side of the world, our Mother is being feted with a PhD. An honorary degree in Humane Letters, by a major American University. Sounds nice.
As one who has spent the better of my adulthood in Universities across the world, I am naturally drawn to the significance of this event. As one who has a couple of degrees, and has, more importantly walked away from a couple of others, it draws me to ruminate on the meaning of this historic event.
Well a degree by itself doesn’t confer an honor that has not been demonstrate-ably earned by the recipient. If anything it is a confirmation, an acknowledgement of what is due, and often times, as is the case here, long over-due.
I remember meeting a gentleman in one of Amma’s tours across India, earlier this year. He wore a badge that stated VIP. I don’t know what, but something playfully prompted me to ask him, regarding the nature of his ‘importance’. Something like, Sir, exactly ‘how’ are you important? He very good naturally and enthusiastically answered me, “Well, I am such and such (telling me of his work title). And I also happen to have the World record on holding the most number of degrees.”
Indeed. At that time, I smiled at Amma’s ingenuity. I had, as an itinerant and habitual student and teacher of this and that, had spent time in at least ten major Universities across three continents spanning a plethora of diverse subjects. It never fails to amaze and delight me, how Amma always makes connections happen.
I was fascinated. He had something like 93 graduate and post graduate degrees from around the world. Many of which was done in correspondence of course. He pulled out his visiting card to show me. The whole card was filled with what seemed like a printer misfire – a bunch of unrelated letters. His list of degrees in abbreviation! The entire card was not enough to list his degrees after his name, he had to end with that other universal abbreviation, etc. Chucklingly I asked for another card so that I could show it to Amma and to keep one for myself.
Unfortunately I did not get near Amma during his darshan. But I could not help but notice the poignancy of the moment. Here was a man who held many, many post graduate degrees, a scholar, by any stretch of intellectual measure, and a persistent one at that (unlike this particular writer) who had PhDs, M Phils, MAs, MSs, D Phils, MLs and whatever nots in Law, Science, Philosophy, Journalism, you name it. And here was a woman who did not go past her fourth standard classroom. And yet, the transmission was happening from Her to him. She has the one degree that truly matters. Master of Her Self. And us with our intellectual preoccupations and pretensions, pastimes and predilections to loose our selves in the transient phenomena and ephemeral knowledge, we are the epitome of ignorance. Slaves to our petty selves.
This is one degree that can be universally conferred. The naughty thought occurs presently wondering, if the gentleman with the world record would be eager to add this ‘earned’ degree on to his list. But which one of us is willing or able to truly acknowledge the degree (there is that word again) to which our ignorance contaminates the sweet shining simplicity of Self and masquerades as knowledge? I recall a long ago poem, when I used to express in that form, “We think. We Know. The beginning of ignorance is the arrogance of knowledge.”
The moment we think we know, the game is over. The mystery is gone. The truth is that we do not Know, and in relaxing in the not knowing, we may fall into that exquisite space of wonder. Of awe. That is grace. Grace is a fresh experience. Uncontaminated by stale knowledge. Worldly knowledge is the most perishable commodity. What holds true in one moment is no longer the case the next. Think about the number of upgrades you have to install on your computer ever so often. However Amma is Knowing. She knows the One thing, knowing which All else is Known. Her Self.
What Amma IS, is actually not for us to say. But that never prevents us from speculating about the nature of truth does it? A friend used to say that the only thing worth talking about is that which can not really be talked about. He was talking about Truth. Amma. But for the sake of this conversation, and because I am after all fond of learning, I am going to venture this theory. Amma is an University. The real Truth is that, she is not an University, She is The Universe. But we will leave that out for now, and settle for our relative truth.
I have now spent more than two years, almost two and a half, may be we can count my four months away, as semester-abroad, or internship (but really running away), with Amma. I mean physically with her. Living in the Ashram when she is in residence, and travelling with her or doggedly following her as she hops continents. Two and half years. Is what took me to earn my Masters degree. A leisurely amble.
I have been recently thinking a lot about what it means to ‘be’ an ashram resident. There are several levels of relating with Amma. For me, the idea of being a ‘resident’ was not an immediately attractive proposition until I saw that here I was in the most rigorous and challenging residential program of Study ever, in the most exclusive university in the world. Look at the odds. How many people must apply to Amma from around the world? And how many people actually get to be with her for periods of lengthy stay? Yet, it is also the most inclusive university in the world. Look at the diversity of people – there are people from every part of the known world, and clearly since the major theme of our study is to explore the limits of what is known, I would venture to add, if not ‘people’ but let’s say, ‘sentient beings’ from beyond our comprehension. And what varied levels of knowledge and ignorance, of being and becoming, of peace and persecution, oh indeed it is the Ultimate training ground. We have animals that behave more humanely than some humans, and humans…well, let’s just say, Amma is a tough task master, the most exacting teacher, and puts us in that extreme place where our hitherto unknown animal tendencies spring out to take a bite out of you.
Jokes aside. Amma is the charnel ground. The moment of reckoning. The existential Boot camp. Amma is Life University. She who has Mastery over her Self, need no honour nor degree, but confers honour on those who confer degree onto her. Anything She accepts from us, She does so out of Her infinite kindness and compassion, and only for our own benefit. And what she confers on us so readily and regularly, has to be earned for ourselves. This is the paradox of our condition. Moment to moment we have to drop our knowledge, this static idea of ourselves and the world, that keeps us imprisoned in concepts of our own making. In this dropping, maybe we can hear the sweet song of our soul, which is Her own voice manifesting as dynamic spirit. And in the listening, may we become a Slave to Her Self, if not a Master of Our Self. Same thing really. One is the Degree program in Bhakti. The other, Jnana.
May She bless us All to successfully earn our degree from Chancellor Amma, PhD.
Radha Devi
