24 Oct 2011 —
Question
Q190: Others faults?
Question 190:
“Amma says: ‘Instead of using a magnifying glass to look at others’ faults, use a mirror to look at your own.’ How do you understand this?”
Please make your answer brief and clear (maximum 5 or 6 lines).
Aum Sarada Smarakaasesha Svabhaava Guna Sampade Namah
These are the last words of Holy Mother, Sri Sarada Devi. (Ma left this world in 1920)
She also said: “If you want peace of mind, do not see the faults of others – see rather your own faults. Learn to regard the whole universe as no different from yourself. No one is a stranger. The world and you are all one.” “Instead of finding faults of others, brush your own teeth properly.”
Amma and all the scriptures say this world is a projection of our own mind. So if we see faults in this world, it is because the root cause is our own mind. So lets introspect and find out the faults in us, instead of always pointing our fingers on others.
When i see someone’s fault, i should do some self analysis. Then the faults that i would discover within myself will make the other person’s fault look trivial which lets me forgive the other person and will makes me humble.
It means all the problems starts from me only. So, if I understand me well, people and surrounding around me will be perfect. Everything depends on how I judge or look at a particular situation.
external world is a reflection of our own habits, emotions, ideologies and philosophies. it is a reflection of our own pointing fingers as well as praising tongue. we can get both or none we want. what do we want? both or none? I guess the answer is pretty clear. Perhaps the ego is the magnifier in that glass!
I understand that..try to look at your faults,correct them instead of arguing or finding faults in others..it makes me feel to be more humble,thanks giving. and to open up.henceforth i will pray more and more to be humble and pray to be able to surrender.
Thinking of bad contaminates our mind. Let us use that time to sing God’s Name, at least make effort to do so. Other’s will not change because you want it to. Change oneself first, leave all to God, and do your work, that is, improve yourself. I had during Dewi Bhawa a great test being dismissed by the satsang leader. With pain and sorrow in my heart I played bells. I heard Mother say to me: concentrate on ME and play the bell as beautifully as you can. Later, at Dewi Bhawa AMMA gave me mantra and then kissed my forehead so firmly with big smile on HER face as if to say – YES my daughter, no matter what think of ME, well done, go on, because you will make it! Lets sing Her name no matter what.
what it means to me is that other peoples’ faults are really very small and it takes a lot of effort to see them (using a magnifying glass).
to see the truth in another is to be inspired. as i am inspired by seeing the truth in another, there is less room for the agitation of the worldly mind. to see what has happened to God in this bodily form has happened to another(karma) is the start of true understanding and compassion.
A thought provoking subject to think. My opinion is that it is natural tendency to find fault in others. But when doing that have a deep instrospection about ourselves whether we have transcended to a perfect level. I do that. It helps me to condition my mind about the imperfections in me, try the level best to remove it and march forward. Finding fault in others springs from our bad Ego. So to ward of this habit the best way to practice humility.
Charity begins at home. My divine AMMA says first teach your self, if u r going in right direction u will find everything going well.
so long as our ego is strong enuf, it is not easy not to look at fault of others..By Amma’s grace, let us go beyond our ego..
Aum Amriteswaryai Namaha!
The Magnifying glass never shows the reflection.It helps us to show big or small of the actual image.But a mirror shows the exact reflection of our image.Each and every person can make their own world according to their Samskara, thinking,behaviour etc.(Collectively we can say it as Mind).So the out side world is reflections of each and every person’s Mind.If one has the knowledge that others also my own reflection,he or she can’t able to find fault with others.To remove dirt from our face,we have to wash our face,but not the mirror.Like wise we have to realise our own fault rather than others fault. There is a beautiful part in SreemadBhagavatam named Rasaleela.(dacnce of Sreekrishna with Gopies.)Each and every Gopy had been Sree Krishna as their partner.Vyasar says that the Gopies are none other than the reflection of Bhagavan Krishna only.(Bhagavatam 10.33.17)Krishna was dancing as if a samll child is dancing infront of a mirror.
You..you…you… No..
In this case it is: Me..Me..Me..I..I…
If Amma would give me the insight to not fault find
When we stop blaming others and thus change our attitude…seeing all as embodiments of the divine, a definite change comes within us. We are more at peace with ourselves. Instead of blaming others, if we do our duties well , others around us watching us will also change their attitude towards us and a more harmonious relationship starts forming around us. It may require faith, patience and determination from our side but finally we will realise the futility of taking refuge in blaming others. Instead of blaming others, let us take things in our stride and try to improve ourselves all the time. Perseverance and utmost faith in Amma will see us through.Om namah Shivaya
There is no point in looking at others faults as you cannot directly affect them or change them as much as you can work on yourself. Plus looking at the negativities just creates a bad atmosphere between people.
Similar to many other sayings from the wise, such as, if you must, spend the first half of the night criticizing others and the second half, others.
Jesus said:’You see the splinter in the eye of your brother and you don’t see the beem in front of your own.’
And shurely it is something, also recognizing the truth of it, life brings tests constantly, and it is (still) easy to fail.
Om Namah Shivaya.
First of all I must say that this message is a wake up call for me because I have been seeing others faults too much lately, and I have read so many times, that we are here in this universe trying to remember our true self. So, how would we ever find the time to understand our oneness with God, our true self, if we keep on trying to change others instead of changing ourselves?
when we do namasmarana of amma automatically all our faults vanish and we have love as our breath all the time.
Devemos praticar diariamente a arte da meditação e nessa pratica observar o que incomodou por demais em nós o ato do outro e então perceber o que é semelhante em nos, toda o mal nasce dentro de nós. Eliminando o mal em nós o mal fora desaparece! Namaste
We usually are ready to see the faults of others. We actually enjoy it. If one person is with some bad qualities, we make it a big issue. At the same time, each one of us are also with many bad qualities. So, what Amma means here is, instead of seeing others mistakes big and enjoying it, if we see our mistakes and rectify it, it will be good for that person, family and society.
try not to find faults in others and be peaceful. everything is a projection of our mind. our mind is so manipulative that it tries to skew every fact to favour the ego. in the process of finding fault with others, we ourselves are losing our peace and happiness. so just accept people as they are. amma has made them do mistakes so that we learn to accept. once we understand this, there is no room for any other thought. we will be gracefully sailing in the samsara sagara
Change begins within.
Amma wants me to look at what I can do to come out of a problematic situation involving someone else. Instead I tend to enlarge the fault in others even as I examine them minutely. It is like Jesus advising us to take care of the beam in our own eyes instead of the speck of dust in those of others. It is practcal too as it is easier to change ourselves than to change others. If we look in the mirror and find we need to use hair dye we can do it. But to tell someone else to use hair dye or botox can be risky if not a waste of time. Also, in Amma’s way of saying our own fault is not necessarily bigger or smaller than that of others. It is just our own fault which only we can correct. If the househelp picks up our jewellery from an unlocked cupboard then it is our fault that we left the cupboard open and it helps both of us if we just lock the cupboard,
Amma is telling us in simple words the ‘ego’ of us, which is cause for most of our problems. Rather than expecting others to change to suit us why not change ourselves to suit others. We human beings are mostly inhibited by our ego,which makes us to find fault in others, but in reality it is our fault in most cases, which is the reason for almost all quarrels or the discomforts we face at times when in company of different people on different occasions at different places.
its the same like getting into others shoes and feel why they do so. Some times we used to think that what others does is entirely wrong. But in reality, that may be the best he can do at that point of view.His action may depend on so many other factors that we are unaware of. So to comment on, we have to first imagine what will we do (should be sincere considering all other negativities) if we are in his place. Then we realise that we would have done something even worser than him.
It appears Amma has sent this message very particularly for me.
Though i realise my faults on every occasion,I repeat the same mistake of finding fault with others first and then to feel sorry.
It needs a lot of courage to do introspection and admit our own mistakes.
Oh,Dear Amma,Having You as Satguru,pl give me the strength to understand that I AM THE PROBLEM AND I AM THE SOLUTION FOR EVERYTHING!!!!
My driving force to stop me from doing that (thing – whatever it is), is what Amma has said in many of her talks and satsangs, (paraphrased as I understand it) “…Children if you want a better life next janmaa control your thoughts, words and actions.” It is not easy, we all know that. One should I believe take it as a challenge, then applying practical solutions to the problems we can overcome even character flaws. Small techniques that Amma has talked about in her various, ‘Awaken Children’ series have helped me. She has said in many of her talks that all we need to do is to become ‘aware’ that we have this particular character flaw.
To find fault is to make the mind of a person deluded with egoism and his whole life is made a muck;where as being a mirror helps to identify the Pure Self and lead a life with moral beauty,cultural glory, social integrity and many other virtues.
May AMMA give the strength to understand this and follow this throughout the future.
Satakodi pranams at AMMAS Lotus feet
Iam very much agree with Thankamani. i think we are parellel thinkers.There is a proverb ie”breaking the mirror for reflecting the dirty or ugly face”.Finding fault with others is like this.Instead of cleaning our face,there is no use of breaking the mirror. It always shows the real relection.Our mind is like the mirror.According to the mind the man thinks and according to the thought he acts.so our mind should be pure.It is very easy to make changes in ourselves, but it is very difficult to make changes in others.There is a story in Mahahbharatam to show how our mind influence in our actions and thinkings.Once Narada Maharshi asked both Dhuryodhana and Dharmaputra to go around the world and make a list of good and bad (negative thinking) people in the world.Both of the started their task and came back with list.Dhryodhana got a list full of negetive thinking people, and even he could not find out a single good and dharmic individual.But Dharmaputra’s list was full of good and Dharmic people and he could not able to find out a single negetive thinking, or bad individual in the country.So as their mind like their out put.If Dhuryodhana was the embodiment of negetivity ,Dhrmaputra was embodiment of rightousness.
It is so easy and rewarding for the ego to criticize others incessantly. The “I” gets more and more inflated with pride and mind can be entertained at low cost by the flaws of others. Whereas confronting our own mistakes requires tremendous courage and dealing with them much heroism.. but if we can do just that, or at least feel inclined to try, perhaps a shift in consciousness is happening and Love can peak through the creaks.