6 May 2013 —
Question
Q224: Success & failures?
Question 224:
Amma says: “The attitude ‘I will only accept success’ is wrong. Learn to also accept the responsibility of failures.” How do you understand this?
Please make your answer brief and clear (maximum 5 or 6 lines).
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A heart, freshly broken, is reminiscent of a luminous, shaky newborn doe…
full of possibility, pain and courage to get up and walk.
The first step in being initiated into AMMA’S Order, is to own each choice, even if it sends us cascading into the abyss. To take 100% responsibility is to claim our treasure; to feel the heritage of our true nature flood in and lift us up. There is great medicine in bolting our heads down to Mother’s feet and asking her to tighten the bolt with each mantra.
Equanimity- having no attachment to outcome (no expectation of reward or thanks) but still trying your best – and chanting whilst you do it – means it was a success you remembered to chant and tried your best. God saw you tried your best, God is the main one to please
It is true that no one can succeed without God’s grace.
But to get God’s grace, the thoughts and actions has to be pure and selfless.
I am responsible for my thoughts and actions. It is my actions which led to my success or failure.
It also means that i am the person who will determine my destiny, not others, not even God.
So better not to blame God for our failures.
Every entity has the right to set goals and work hard to achieve the same. When set into operation, the individual who sets goal, and all working in the team become inseparable factors of the goal itself. All these work in a time space continuum. Consequently, outcome of the efforts –success or failure- is the resultant of many tangible ,intangible ,visible and invisible factors related to the goal. Right attitude is to share the responsibility of the outcome, whatsoever.
My divine MAA has taugh tus to remain sam in every situation whether you win or not. Be a sakhshi to everything that happens in life and not to be affected by the consequences.
Success and failure are but the results of one’s actions together with divine grace. Generally, we tend to attribute our success to our hard work and sincere efforts. But when it comes to failure, we blame extraneous factors like the people around us or the circumstances.We are quick to even hold God responsible for the miseries we face in life.Amma wants us to adopt an attitude of acceptance, receiving the bouquets as well as the brickbats with a sense of responsibility for our actions.
Generally speaking, when people make a mistake (speaking from first-hand experience) and are taken to task, their initial response is to either blame someone else for the mistake, or blame the circumstances. Taking responsibility is like a breath of fresh air, however it requires humility and a deep insight into the nature of the mind. Ego likes to take credit, not accept failure.
Accepting success is v easy and simple, but accepting failure is totally another cup of tea! We make, dream and create our world by our thoughts, intentions and actions, whether negative or positive , and so as successes are because of us, our failures are also because of us. We had created it, consciously or subconsciously, and then we experience, learn and grow. So ‘ALL is well’ under the sun and all is for our good. We enjoy fruits of ‘good’ and learn from fruits of ‘bad’.
In all the ardent struggles, one must meet failures which strengthen the will and so failures must be stepping stones or great lessons which we must never fail to notice. No adventurous journey or ambitious goal is met without failure or difficulty. So, let’s accept smilingly and proceed till we reach the Goal.
Here in spiritual life, the Goal is one’s own Self or God within, which is formidably caged and chained by passions and desires. Not to be able to overcome them is a spiritual failure. But we must learn the lesson for every desire brings sorrow born out of ignorance. So, one must seek the knowledge of Vedanta(Wisdom of the Divine Master) to overcome these failures and realize the Universal Oneness.
Accepting the responsibility of failure shows that we are progressing on the ladder of maturity.. perhaps even spiritual maturity. Moreover it requires more of an introspective approach to life and an inner questioning. This spirit can help us improve from inside out and become more refined human beings.
Also by accepting the outcome of failure we strengthen surrender in us, so key to seekers of happiness.
Failure ia the threshold to our success.From the failure we can learn so many experiences and can move forward.Our Life is compared to an Ocean with full of huge and small waves and also full of big and small water living beings which can attack us.Without ups and downs life is impossible in this world.Our most beloved Amma always says an egsample that those who know the technicques of swimming in an Ocean ,he or she can enjoy swimming and others ofcourse will drawn into the sea.it is foolishness to wait the Sea to calm down(without waves) to swim.So we can’t able to change the circumstances but we can face it tactfully by using our discrimination power.So i think our most beloved Amma wish to say us to be maintain the equilibrium (Smachitha bhava)in each and every actions and also warns us to drop the doership and enjoyership in the actions done by us.Then there will not be any anciety or worry or ego about the friut of actions(success and Failure). It may be failure or success, but accept it as Prasadabhudhi.(Bhagavan’s Desire).And move forward as an attitude of”EVEN THIS WILL PASS AWAY’
I make friends with hindrances and every obstacle becomes a stepping stone! In that way we are surely on the way to success!
We will have to learn things from failures. That only will bring success. So we will have to accept both equally.
we should be in a advaithic mode of life,to avoid being in duality,to overcome such instances.
What do we know?! Whose success is it and whose failure? When we lose sight of that, is there an alternative to sadness coming our way? When the “logic” of linear progression upward and onward doesn’t happen, we feel unloved. It is all about “me,” not the other person who is also having trouble, and the habit of needing to feel good from happy external events. Difficult to shake but what other course is there? We need to make peace with our inadequacies because we aren’t even the source of these.
success and failure the two things feared by the human,it is like probability as we studied in the science class,as we flip a coin it has got only two probability either head or tail,life is also like that win or loss one is sunishchitam it will come.by gurus grace, the one who shows the light,the path,the destiny …we can win over all miseries of material world in a second. OM SRI GURUBYO NAMAHA
Buddha said to strive on with deligence. Christ said seek and you will find. If we cannot accept failures we will give up in our search easily. Amma’s Grace is important. With Amma’s Grace we can overcome failures and reach the goal. Amma Bless.
Like the baby who falls yet gets up and learn to walk, failures as they say are stepping stones to success.It is easy to fail but if we have it within us to pause and analyse the reasons we can take success in our stride and not be too overwhelmed by it.Then we can face failures and not be disapointed.But nothing happens without the guidance of the GREAT GURU AMMA to whom we should surrender under any circumstance
The Lord says that we have to take success and failure with equanimity. It is possible only when we detach ourselves from the body , mind and intellect and are able to remain a witness to the external world. May all be able to remain a witness always.
so long as our individual I exists, we better accept both results – success or failures …that is the least we can do to help the world..
We Define success with material gains such as wealth, status/position, education and so on. We call ourself successful if we have material success to our heart’s content. May be for spiritual seeker definition of success should different – If you are happy and content now in the current situation then you are successful. Otherwise you have failed irrespective of material gains you may have acquired until now.
Hence to me accepting responsibility of failure is to accept responsibility for your unhappiness or sorrow. And then look for the root cause. Amma says, root cause of your sorrows is desire.
“A sacred burden is this life ye bear:
Look on it, lift it, bear it solemnly,
Stand up and walk beneath it steadfastly.
Fail not for sorrow, falter not for sin,
But onward, upward, till the goal ye win.”
Frances Anne Kemble
The map of my life was made by me. Past choices laid the path as likes and dislikes forged the way. Today as I travel down the road of my creation, attraction and aversion spring up like geysers arising from long forgotten deeds. The blame falls not on another, but on me. Running after success while chased by failure, is one truly more favorable than the other? The original “sin”, the original lapse in memory now covered by clouds of grey…with the right attitude and action in hand, it’s but a matter of time before Her grace makes it all fall away.
this to say, god is one and not another leads to a feeling of separation. A split from LIFE. A feeling of problem, I then need to solve.
kindness is sweet, instead the force that is rigid inflexible,
the plant is shade and gently hugs the waist,
the tree of death is dry and very stiff
during the life you accept defeats and victories,
who is very rigid and inflexible, is accompanied
by death, is a low wave, is the force,
who is gentle and flexible
in victory and failure is accompanied by a life,
high wave, kind and willing to accept.
Amma please let us know how to die in the grace of joy and
not in the throes of pain and stiffness of the failures,
as a thread of ‘grass moving in the wind.
Not taking responsibility of failures. The way the planet looks now, to me, humanity in general, is an example of this. To only except the success or advancement of human survival, without looking at the cost to the planet and other sentient creatures. To look at how many things i have accumulated, without looking at the cost, physical and spiritual, Is ignorance. With that that there is no growth of True wisdom. No progress toward the enlightened Humanity of non-duality. Less chance of the peaceful surrender during or at the end of this bodily Life.
FORGETTING GOD IS THE BIGGEST FAILURE
AND KEEPING ALWAYS GOD IN MIND AND HEART IS THE REAL SUCCESS
“Success” and “Failure”- are relative terms. And we have to experience both in Life! There are ups and downs and we should be able to take all of this in our stride.
It is similar to “Light” & “Darkness” How can we enjoy the Joy of Sunlight & Day without knowing Darkness & night. Without failures, we will be too egoistic and will not be able to realize the Supreme knowledge and truth of GOD! Failures will and should come once in a while to hit and bring us out of our ego. Failures will strengthen us-and with a Guru like AMMA, we have no fears! Failures will breeze in and we can take it as AMMA’s armour will protect us.
fAILURES and setbacks are indeed frustrating even if we repeat ammas words every day . “Experience is what you get when YOU DONT GET WHAT YOU WANT” – R. Pauch.