Memories of Amma’s first USA Yatra 1987 – part 2

The front porch of the Kalari* was where Amma was sitting that day in August of 1986 when I arrived back**. Some of the residents had also joined Amma there and were curious to know how my time had been spent. What was happening? When would Amma be leaving for America? Where were the places Amma would be visiting? Who had heard of Amma? I recall the volley of questions being both exciting and overwhelming at the same time as I struggled to answer them in a clear way. Within a moment I noticed that Amma was sitting completely quiet, taking it all in. Her deep, eternal eyes and my eyes locked on each other, and there was a stillness in the air.

Amm's house, Vedanta Vidyalaya, Kalari, Family house is seen here ( from L to R). Pic taken from where the Kali Temple situated now

“ശരിയായോ മോളേ? Sheriyayo, mole?” was all Amma asked me. (Is it all ok, daughter?) The effect that Amma’s simple and direct question had on me can’t be described. It was as if the air itself had stopped breathing, waiting for my answer. Time was momentarily suspended while Amma tested the bearing capacity of my heart to carry Her message to the faraway children and bring Amma to them, all the while being far away from Amma’s physical presence in order to do so. Intuitively I sensed that Amma was measuring my resolve. Calmly and deliberately I spoke the words, “ശരിയായി അമ്മേ Sheriyayi, Amme,”  in reply (All is ok, Amma), and in that moment I felt a jolt, as if a bridge was materializing between Amma’s heart and my own. Amma smiled compassionately at me and held me in Her arms for a long time. Amma wanted me to go and rest from the journey. When I stood up to take leave of Amma, I could unmistakably sense a deep bond had been sealed between us that would give me “all that was needed without my asking” as Amma had instructed me a few months back. In that moment I knew in my soul that the tour was on, that Amma would be with Her children before long. But that a lot of effort and sacrifice would go into it. I remember a tremendous feeling of joy spreading over me.

There was not a moment to waste. The very next day I proposed that a newsletter be started to send to the people on the mailing list collected at the video shows. What? A newsletter? But Amma hasn’t even visited the US yet, was the response. Not satisfied I got a translator to ask Amma about my idea and She heartily agreed asking me to bring a tape recorder and She would answer questions for the first issue. Not only that, but with Her own hand She wrote a letter to send to all those who had signed onto the mailing list.

– Kusuma

to be continued
=—-

*In those days the Kalari had no homa fire pit for pujas on the porch in front, only two steps on either side exiting to the sand between Amma’s family home on the north side, and the other set to the south where Amma’s house was located. The south set of stairs is always where Amma sat for bhajans each evening at sunset.

** from eight weeks in the USA & Europe to organize Amma’s first world tour; see the previous blog, ‘My Children, they are crying for me…‘